Stop the Presses– MLB 2013 Trade Deadline News!

Baseball trade deadline headlines from newspapers around the Nation:
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PHILLIES RELEASE PITCHER CARLOS ZAMBRANO
Enraged Right-Hander Goes On Rampage in Downtown Area, Tips Over Buses, Swats At Responding Police Helicopters From Atop Philly City Hall

ALEX RODRIGUEZ SAYS HE’S READY TO PLAY FOR THE YANKEES AGAIN
Claims His Most Recent Shipment of PEDs Should All But Guarantee 2013 Post Season Berth

GIANTS GM BRIAN SABEAN UNSURE WHETHER SF SHOULD BE “BUYERS” OR “SELLERS” AT TRADE DEADLINE
Decides To Re-Sign 47-Year-Old Miguel Tejada, Schedules Fifth “2013 Willie Mays Day” At AT&T Park To Distract Fans 

RED SOX EYEING HOUSTON ASTROS STARTER BUD NORRIS
“At This Point,” Stated Sox GM Ben Cherington, “I Really Can’t Tell You Why”

YANKEES ACQUIRE OUTFIELDER ALFONSO SORIANO FROM CUBS
Soriano's Demands Included 20 Pounds Of Blue M&Ms Delivered To His Locker Each Day, Phone Number Of ARod’s Personal Doctor

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